Sharks, Peanuts and Why I Need Stories of Redemption

Once upon a time, in a land not far away, there lived a little girl and her older sister. This older sister was everything to the little girl. When she smiled, the little girl would smile. It was a sign that everything was all right.
 Then one day the older sister went away. The little girl didn't understand why. All she knew was that the world was darker than it was before. After a while, the sister came back, but she wasn't as before. There was something wrong. Something the little girl couldn't put her finger on.
 There were conversations with mommy and the older sister that got steadily louder and louder until the little girl had to go outside because the conversations made her shake inside. Something was wrong, but the little girl didn't understand what it was.
 A few years passed and the little girl got older. The older sister had left a while back, her new love drugs and alcohol. When the little girl got to see her older sister, she didn't know her. This didn't stop the little girl from loving her though. Her older sister had changed, but she didn't know how much. Drugs and alcohol couldn't change a person that much, right?
 Every year the little girl's one request to the older sister was that she would come for her birthdays. Every year the sister was absent until one day the sister came.
 On this particular birthday, she got the little girl a stuffed shark which the little girl named, "Peanut." An odd name for a shark, truth be told, but that was his name. There was no convincing the little girl otherwise.
 Hopefully things would be better now. The older sister would keep her promises. She'd be around and would do things older sisters did with younger sisters, whatever that was. But it was not to be.
 After that birthday there followed years and years where the older sister would promise the little one that she would come, only to never show up. The little girl learned not to trust, to build walls around her heart.
 Mommy cried a lot and the little girl didn't know what to do. She'd put music on for Mommy and for a little while, Mommy would be happy.
 Endless phone calls and many years later and the little girl grew into a teenager. Her older sister wasn't coming back. She didn't care. She'd chosen alcohol and drugs, so the girl grew up without her sister.
 The stuffed shark that had been her friend throughout the years, she finally decided to put away in a wooden shed. After a while she forgot about it. Some
things were better forgotten, some emotions better behind a wall.
 The shed grew overgrown with grasses and weeds. Rats and mice invaded its walls, and the girl got older.
 The teenager became an adult and her little sister decided to clean out the shed. Many things were thrown away. Old clothes, pictures, childhood toys. Then the little sister found one thing that the girl had forgotten: the stuffed shark, Peanut.
 Seeing Peanut brought back many memories and broke down the walls erected in her heart. It made her realize that not all memories of the older sister were bad and that maybe the older sister could come around. Just maybe, one day, she would change, and they could be together again.

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You might have guessed that the little girl in the story was me. My older sister succumbed to the lure of drugs and alcohol when I was four.
 I watched my Mom deal with the grief of losing a child that wasn't dead, but that she could no longer be around.
 I was about six years old when my sister bought me Peanut and until today, when my little sister found him, I'd forgotten all about him. I'd stopped thinking about my older sister too.
 Seeing my old stuffed animal brought back so many memories. I cried for my sister today as I haven't had in over ten years.
 For a long time, I've felt drawn to stories of redemption and I didn't know why. I like stories where the villain gets their comeuppance, but I love stories where the villain is redeemed. They still have to deal with the consequences of their actions, but they've turned a corner.
 Now I know that the reason I love and need stories of redemption, is because I want to believe that redemption is possible for my sister. I need to believe that, like the characters in the stories, she can turn around for the better as well.